Little Miss Sunshine

We met with the foster care social worker for a question session. We imagined hearing how messy it could be and running. And then as she told story after story our eyes peered out from our the cover of our privilege and into the immense need in our community. From that moment on we could no longer pretend we didn't see. We could no longer go about our merry way acting like the desperate need for safe and love filled foster homes in our city wasn't real. We couldn't unknow or unsee or unhear- time didn't give the option of a rewind. So we finished the meeting staring into a new reality in front of us. And while we stared it all in the face our world cracked open and shifted.

That same social worker would call us and ask us if we could take a little love who wasn't even 7lbs. Our world cracking open yet again as we said, "yes." We sprinted to Target to buy a whole baby registry in 2.5 hours. Then there she was. Behind the pink blankie I peeled back and saw her, little miss sunshine.

That same social worker sat in the room with us as we made plans for her to reunify with the mom that grew her under her heart. This was messier than we ever could have grasped in that first meeting. And yet still, I wrote out that day through tear stained sheets of paper- "today I watched redemption. My heart is torn open but I stood on holy ground I just know it."

Our world had once again cracked open this time for another mama like me- who had love running through her veins and a fierce mama heart. Our stories were so different but the closer I got in proximity, the more compassion spilled over in place of judgement. The more grace flooded in to water hope.

The reunification didn't play out as planned. That same mama stood before the judge and asked if we could be the family to love her little girl forever. Our world once again cracked open. This time grace spilling out from her to water the hope of our daughters future. Our family forever growing by two- our beautiful girl and her first mama.